scene: you on the 2 train downtown. reading a book. 
strategy: looking down means you don’t see them looking at you.
rationale: they will forget you, you will never forget them.

cue child: “why are his nails painted? boys aren’t supposed to do that!”

6 more stops. 
lose place in book.

cue mom: “boys can do whatever they want!”
strategy: pretend not to notice. 

5 stops.

cue child screaming: 
“mommy, it’s not right. boys don’t do that!”

4 stops. 

cue train amused. cue train smiling.
child: “look, everyone look!”

cue nervous smile.

strategy: laughing at yourself makes them more comfortable with you. 
strategy: laughing at yourself makes you more comfortable with you.
rationale: why would anyone want to look like you?

3 stops.

cue mom: “you better be quiet or that man is going to attack us!” 

2 stops. 

cue conspicuous body.
cue adams apple.
(i mean cue original sin).

cue frenzied breath. 
cue palpitating heart. 
cue churning stomach.

1 stop.

cue too-big hands.
cue too-big shoulders.
cue too-big gall.

how dare he leave the house?
how dare he take the train?
how dare he be?

or rather:
how dare he she?
how dare! heshe!

do nothing.

your beauty is their beast.
your victim is their villain.

walk out

do not

i repeat!
do not look back!

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